Fun With Food…

We all enjoy eating. Everyone has their favorite things, whether it’s freshly baked chocolate chip cookies, a homemade pasta dish or Grandmothers’ pickled cucumbers.  Food can remind us of happy times, bring back cherished memories or just make us feel wonderful as we happily munch away. I understand that. I’m like that. Some things are just too hard to resist.

But Bill is obsessed with food. What are we having? How am I preparing it? Why are we having that? Why do you eat leftovers? Is that food still good or will I get sick? Why do you freeze food? Why don’t you shop every day? Why aren’t all of our meals hot? Why do you use a grill? Why don’t you fry all of the food?  He has a list of rules for food and eating.  It’s exhausting.

He will only eat fruit a few times a week because every day would be too much.  Too much what? vitamins??? He prefers lettuce.

No snacks. Not even after school when he feels woozy, light-headed and hungry. I set a new precedent the other day when I informed him, no snack, no basketball. That’s all I need is for him to faint at a park somewhere. He ate a half a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and guess what?  He felt better! He’s slowly amending that rule. Yesterday he ate 7 whole tortilla chips with melted cheese. He looked longingly at the rest of the chips on the plate, but insisted he was full. I gave the leftovers to the dog. It’s a slow process.

He told me his family back in China are vegetarians. His grandmother shops for vegetables everyday and that’s what they eat. For every meal.  And Bill is not a vegetarian. It’s no wonder he tried to get me to serve steak everyday when he first arrived.

I have large teenage boys. It’s certainly not the quantity of the food being eaten that is an issue. We are used to groceries being systemically destroyed as they are unloaded from the car. He’s a skinny kid, and can really pack it away. I’m use to that.  What I am not used to is the quantity of discussion, complaints and analysis of every morsel of food.

I thought this might be a cultural phenomenon. Perhaps this is what goes on everyday in China with regard to food…..  But once again, reaching out to the other international host families, I have learned this is yet another “Bill” thing…..

Now, we do not serve gourmet, five-course, fancy meals every night.  With work, school, activities, there just isn’t time. What we do have are good, filling dinners, ie, meat, veggies, a side. There is always plenty, it’s tasty and no one every goes hungry. And yet the complaints are seemingly endless……

The most baffling objection appeared early in our new living arrangement.

Chinese people don’t eat rice until it is fried with vegetables.

I may not be a Chinese cultural expert, but I’m pretty sure I’ve heard that millions of Chinese people eat, and supposedly enjoy, rice.  When I said I was making rice to go with dinner, he said that was wrong. It had to be fried with vegetables. He wouldn’t eat it. Just do it his way. I patiently explained that I don’t eat many carbs, and therefore did not want it mixed with the veggies, that he could mix it himself during dinner.  He just shook his head, and said no.

After letting him know, with a little less patience, that there was always PB&J or lunch meat and an apple if he didn’t want to eat what was being served for dinner, he stopped. And then proceeded to eat THREE servings of rice that night.

Bill also does not eat cold foods, or drink cold beverages. This is due to the fact that cold drinks produce stomach ailments, and make you very sick. I wasn’t aware of that little tidbit. (This rule apparently does not include ice cream, now that he has discovered how good it is).

He warms his water. He warms his cold cereal, and then complains that it’s mushy. I’ve tried to show him how to just heat the milk, but that’s now how I want to do it.

The other day he heated up orange juice, and then said it tasted funny. Really????

Another difference, and I do chalk this up as a cultural one, is his need to have leisurely meals. Wouldn’t we all like that? He prefers to stroll through the kitchen, pursuing the cupboards and fridge. He likes to have warmed mike and oatmeal, maybe an egg, some cheese (he makes an exception with the cold for that), a toasted waffle. This would be fine if he was out of bed earlier, but he refuses to get up with his alarm. I have to rouse him out of bed, and we both need to be out of the house by 7:30am.  His morning eating ritual is then hurried and unsatisfying to him, and irritating to me.

The other morning he decided to fry iceberg lettuce with garlic at 7:15am because he felt the need for more vitamins.  That was not a good morning for any of us.

Bill buys his lunch at school every day, and when I offered to make his lunch when I made my daughters and husbands, he said yes. Turkey sandwich, pretzels, an apple.  He did not like it. He told my husband the lunch was no good! So he’s back to buying it. It was probably too cold for him.

We have taken him out to several Chinese restaurants, and one Thai establishment. We’ve had more Asian food recently than we have for the past year.  And yet….. It’s not like this in China. That’s not what we eat in China. They don’t serve it like this in China.

Guess what??? We’re NOT IN CHINA…….

and then he proceeds to eat like a horse.