I treat Bill much the same as my own kids in my expectations of his behavior. I ask very little, I don’t care that his room is a mess, as long as the mess stays in his room and doesn’t start to seep out into the hallway, I’m good.
I don’t expect any of them be late for school or activities in order to clean the kitchen or bathroom. Helping out around the house has a flexible schedule.
However, I do expect them to bring their dishes to the sink, rinse them and stack them if the dishwasher happens to be full. Bill has recently regressed on this point. He leaves dishes on the table, with food sticking and drying to the plates and bowls. He finishes and leaves. I can only assume he thinks the maid will get them.
We discussed this, again, and he said he would try and remember…. because I thought the dishwasher cleaned them…… Yes, it does, it just doesn’t crawl across the kitchen floor to collect and rinse dirty dishes…
Bill has also recently been sitting in the backseat when I drive him places when it’s just the two of us. I asked him why?
I like it here and feel comfortable here, it’s how I ride in China.
Alright…..so I may not be the maid, but apparently, I am the chauffeur.
mom not maid
Omg your story is soooo similar to mine. Our family chose to take a Chinese exchange student this year. What I had hoped to be a positive experience for all turned out to be the worst year of our lives. Spoiled, inconsiderate, know it all, arrorgant and ungrateful is what he revealed himself to be to all of us.
The only good thing that came out of the experience is that my children know how NOT to behave to other people, how much manners matter and how they appreciate our family even more now.
This is one experience I will never repeat!
P.Kyle
how long did you have your student?
P.Kyle
9 months!
P.Kyle
9 long months!
another chauffer
we have a Chinese student right now, just a six month placement. He is our 6th student, but first from China, and our first at a private school and with a stipend. Previously we hosted from Germany (twice), Brazil, Serbia and Moldova. While all of our prior students were true teenagers 🤣they became a part of our family. I think the Chinese culture is so different, I fear we won’t have the same connection with this student. As you mentioned, no interest in our family or our culture. I don’t know if he can’t speak English, or just won’t speak to me. Four months to go…
Krista
We have had our Chinese student for going on 3 months. I’m wishing I had thought to explore this before now, since most experiences have been the same. Your experience sounds so much like what we’re going through. We’re not receiving a stipend of any kind and have chosen to not ask him to pay for anything thus far except his own personal items. Last week he went with us on vacation. I had hope that it would be a time of finally bonding with him, but no! One of the main reasons we’re hosting is to have a companion for our son. He’s a sophomore in HS and he’s Autsic (Aspergers) and needs a friend since he’s also an only child. Our student acts as if he doesn’t really like our son and merely tolerates him. So this has been a bit of a nightmare for my son’s self esteem. While on our vacation, I was shocked at how uninterested he was in any of the sites or the gorgeous coastline. He apparently hated the days we spent at the beach, complaining and choosing to no participate in outings. Like it was torture or something. He seems uninterested in learning about much of anything, including English. I just don’t understand why he’s here! We believe he’s forced to be here by his parents because what’s the point?! Interesting to see that we’re not an exception but rather the rule with Chinese students. Very disappointed and discouraged for the time we have ahead with him. I feel used! Sad. It’s not what we signed up for. Just a bed and breakfast and taxi service. ☹️